Category: Joke Board
These 16 Police Comments were taken off actual police
car videos around the country:
#16 "You know, stop lights don't come any redder that
the one you just went through."
#15 "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're
new. They'll stretch after you wear them a while."
#14 "If you take your hands off the car, I'll make
your birth certificate a worthless document."
#13 "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."
#12 "Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second?
Because that's the speed of the bullet that'll be chasing you."
#11 "You don't know how fast you were going? I guess
that means I can write anything I want to on the ticket, huh?"
#10 "Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor,
but I don't think it will help. Oh, did I mention
that I'm the shift supervisor?"
#9 "Warning! You want a warning? O.K., I'm warning
you not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket."
#8 "The answer to this last question will determine
whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat
or a dog?"
#7 "Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a
place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy
and corn dogs and step in monkey poop."
#6 "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my
wife gets a toaster oven."
#5 "In God we trust, all others we run through NCIC."
#4 "How big were those 'Just two beers' you say you had?"
#3 "No sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to,
but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we can."
#2 "I'm glad to hear that Chief (of Police) is a
personal friend of yours. So you know someone who
can post your bail."
AND THE WINNER IS....
#1 "You didn't think we give pretty women tickets?
You're right, we don't. Sign here."
Bob
Hmm please leave your brains in the bins provided when you walk through the door of police college.
lol
Those are funny. Personally I've never stepped in monkey poop at a fair, but oh well. I love the last one about pretty women.
LOL, these are great. They made me laugh!
lol, very nice, loved it